28. Crosby, Columbo, and Vallee (1932)

Release date: March 19th, 1932

Series: Merrie Melodies

Director: Rudolf Ising

Starring: Johnny Murray (Boy), Rudolf Ising (Totem Pole), Ken Darby (Lead), Art Scott (Bear, Vallee, Crosby)

Ahh, the three crooners! This marks the start of MANY, many, many Bing Crosby references (who is never even showed onscreen here). I know Rudy Vallee was referenced by Porky in Porky at the Crocadero, and Russ Columbo... well, he gets the short end of the stick. He’s not mentioned in the short, and would die two years later in 1934 due to an accidental misfiring of a gun. This short takes place in a Native American village where the love of the crooners has become a plight, almost putting a forest in jeopardy.

We open to a group of Native Americans doing a war chant. They sing the titular song “Crosby, Columbo, and Vallee”, a song lamenting the perils of how the crooners have influenced their women. The premise of the song is highly amusing, those damn crooners! Every time your woman kisses you, she’s thinking of Bing! However, this scene is rather uncomfortable, especially considering that a slur is used towards Native American women. Thankfully, the rest of the cartoon is relatively harmless—not making this okay by any means, but... It’s tame in comparison to what we’ll be seeing. 

We see our hero of the film, a cute little native boy who’s canoeing in time to the music. Frank Marsales does a great job adapting to the mood and the setting with his music! The gag above is reused from Hittin’ the Trail for Hallelujah Land. We get some shots of him hopping among some tulips and weaving his way through logs.

He hops out of his canoe and heads towards a teepee, calling for his sweetheart, Minnehaha (in reference to Longfellow’s 1855 poem The Song of Hiawatha). His voice rises to a call to a scream as she’s unresponsive, but eventually she comes out.

Finally, we see what he’s after. The boy produces a radio, and, with the help of a friendly spider, get a connection. The girl perches herself on a rock near a waterfall (with the boy using a tiny pine tree as an umbrella to dispel any spare water streams) while the warbling tones of Bing Crosby sing “Many Happy Returns of the Day”.

Minnehaha launches into the title number of “Crosby, Columbo and Vallee”, with various woodland critters dancing by her side. The song itself, again, is very catchy and entertaining to think about. Bing Crosby, the menace to society! 

Our first celebrity caricature! This Rudy Vallee dog sings “This is My Love Song". I’m a sucker for celebrity caricatures, and as limited as the animation is, it looks a lot like him! 

Everyone is swayed by the music, even an anthropomorphized campfire, which turns catastrophically. The flames literally begin to dance and march across the forest, burning everything in sight: a tree, who skitters away embarrassedly as his lack of foliage leaves him naked, and another tree inhabited by a group of baby birds.

The birds shriek “Help!” “Fire!” “Save me!” One by one as the flames threaten their lives. Thankfully, the boy does some quick thinking.

Ringing a tulip like a bell summons the help of some bees, who transform a net into a trampoline. I love how you can see the shadow of the net on the ground, too! I’m glad they took the extra time to animate that.

The flames are stubborn. They follow the boy and the bees, burning the boy in the ass a few times for good measure as the remaining flames continue to endanger the baby birds.

No worries! The birds leap out of the nest and land to safety on the net... Almost. The flames burn off all their feathers. Predictable, but amusing! Nothing can ever end too well for anyone, huh? To further absurdity, the boy extinguishes the fire with ease by merely spitting on it, similar to the ending in Friz Freleng’s Flowers for Madame in 1935. Iris out.

I’m glad that this is our first appearance of a celebrity caricature! May the continue. The short, as all Merrie Melodies go, is very catchy with a beautifully atmospheric underscore. The visuals are fun and imaginative, such as the boy using a pine tree as an umbrella and the naked tree running away.

However, the uncomfortableness is still present with the stereotypes. They’re relatively tame compared to some shorts, but nevertheless still needs to be addressed. Mainly my discomfort lies in the beginning sequence, it didn’t keep me from enjoying the short entirely, but it’s presence was certainly there. Nevertheless, it’s a rather average cartoon. Not bad, amusing Rudy Vallee caricature and Bing Crosby impression! But it’s certainly dated in many of its aspects.

Here’s a link: view at your own discretion, there’s a slur used at 0:49.